The Art of Co-Parenting

“Then He took the children in His arms and placed His hands on their heads and blessed them”

                                                                 -Mark 10:16

As many of you know…I had Lilly at the ripe age of 19. I was, for lack of better words, a baby. Like most teenagers, I was not looking for a life partner when I linked myself to Lilly’s dad forever…but it is what it is and 6 and ½ years later we are still fumbling our way through parenthood. So here’s the thing. Being a  parent is hard…being a parent with an ex…MUCH harder. Thankfully for us, Lilly was young enough when her father and I split that it won’t cause any permanent damage (well here’s to hoping at least) and again…6 and ½ years later I feel like we are finally starting to figure it out. Now don’t get me wrong, we are by no means the ideal divorced parents…but then again…we are divorced, so us getting a long all the time is just out of the question. But I can say that we are at a place where we are putting our differences aside and putting Lilly first. I know how hard it can be to bite your tongue when all you want to do is scream. I know how terrifying it is sending your child away for weeks at a time not knowing with complete certainty that she is getting the kind of love that she receives at home with you.  But what it comes down to is trusting that God will take care of His child…the child the He so graciously let you borrow and that He trusted you to raise. If God can trust me…I can trust Lilly’s dad. 

 Lilly’s dad just recently moved to Texas with his girlfriend who I absolutely adore and Lilly is over the moon.  I feel like Lilly can finally have the relationships that I had growing up. Instead of 2 parents who loved me…I got 4. My sweet baby has 4 people who would do anything for her and I feel blessed to have finally gotten to this point. So to all you single parents who think it will never get easier…hang in there. Im not saying that every day is easy for us…but we never fail to work through the hard days and come out stronger, better parents. But remember, every decision we make and every word we speak directly effects our children….and you never know when little ears and eyes are around.  All I know is that if you love your child, you will so anything to put their happiness first. If Lilly’s father and I can do it…anybody can. So I leave you with this.

“But when I am afraid, I will pit my trust in You. I praise God for what he has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?”      -Psalm 56:3-4

With all my love,

Kayleigh 

I am Redeemed

Alright…so blogging is hard. You know what makes it even harder? Not having the internet at home. Thank you Canton, TX for having crappy, over priced internet. Boo.

Anyway.  I have been thinking about this post for MONTHS now and have even sat down to write it twice…but TV or my husband’s sweet kisses always seemed to win out. So this is my attempt at blessing someone today.  Here goes…

I have gotten to a point where only 2 radio stations play in my car. Both Christian radio…both good for my soul. One morning while I was driving to work a song I had never heard came on called “Redeemed” by the group Big Daddy Weave. I instantly loved it. Not many songs make such a strong first impression but these lyrics stayed with me throughout my work day.  To my delight I heard the song again while I was driving home (I didn’t say the stations were much for variety) and then bought it on Itunes shortly after. $1.29 well spent.  So, please read these lyrics and let them into your heart.

Seems like all I could see was the struggle
Haunted by ghosts that lived in my past
Bound up in shackles of all my failures
Wondering how long is this gonna last
Then You look at this prisoner and say to me "son
Stop fighting a fight it's already been won"

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, now I'm not who I used to be
I am redeemed, I'm redeemed

All my life I have been called unworthy
Named by the voice of my shame and regret
But when I hear You whisper, "Child lift up your head"
I remember, oh God, You're not done with me yet

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, now I'm not who I used to be

Because I don't have to be the old man inside of me
'Cause his day is long dead and gone
Because I've got a new name, a new life, I'm not the same
And a hope that will carry me home

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, 'cause I'm not who I used to be

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe every stain, yeah, I'm not who I used to be
Oh, God, I'm not who I used to be
Jesus, I'm not who I used to be
'Cause I am redeemed
Thank God, redeemed

Pretty incredible right? Recently an old friend of mine who recently found Jesus posted on Facebook that some of her friends where giving her a hard time about her new found Faith. They were mocking her…mocking Jesus. This song instantly came to my mind and I shared it with her and blessed her with it. My goal here tonight is to encourage people to stay strong in their Faith. This is not only our battle, it’s Jesus’ as well. I think back on the person I used to be and the mistakes I have made and all I can do is thank the Lord for saving me from that life. He redeemed me through His love and mercy and I will spend all of my days trying to honor Him for this gift.  There is no sin too great to be forgiven by God. He releases you from the chains of shame and made you clean. You are redeemed through Jesus’ blood and God’s love. How cool is that? There will be people who doubt you and mock you…but do you not think that Jesus was mocked and doubted every single day He was here? We are fighting a battle that Jesus has already won. If anything…that should make it easier for us.  

 Please read these lyrics closely and if you have a spare $1.29…buy it. Trust me, it will bless you. I am lucky enough to be filled with the love of Jesus every single day …are you? 

"Jesus gave His life for our sins, just as God out Father planned, in order to rescue us from this evil world in which we live" -Galatians 1:4

It's Not Goodbye...

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget"

I am writing this post as I drive home from saying goodbye to my best friend who is about to embark on the most incredible journey of her life. Yes, I realize how dangerous this is...but i can't tell you how many posts have been lost because I thought about them while driving and by the time I got to where I could write my thoughts down...they were gone.

This post is about friendship. Not just any friendship...but the kind that touches your soul and stays with you forever. I have been lucky enough to have a friend like that. I met Buffy about 2 years ago at Dallas Baptist University, where her and Josh both went to school. Buff and I had an instant bond. She came to me at a time of cross roads in my life. I was really focusing on the kind of person God wanted me to be and the kind of friends I needed around me. I believe with every beat of my heart that God place Buffy in my life for a reason.

Let me tell you a little about Buffy. She is the most kind hearted, fun, cool, crazy, spiritually motivated person I have ever met. I had never met someone who so openly loved the Lord and wanted to share that love with every person she came in contact with. Refreshing is an understatement. She has encouraged me in every step I have taken. She has stepped up when others fell short, she has gotten through when I thought no one possibly could. The Lord speaks through her. It is a gift that she has so graciously used on me. Tonight, as we sat and talked about our lives, she looked at me and said,"what is it that I need to pray about for you?" I mean really? Just what i needed. Tears run down my face just thinking about how blessed I am to have such AMAZING friend who's heart beats for others.

I am and will be eternally grateful for Buffy Youngblood. Although my heart is hurting because i know how much I will miss her...my chest also swells with pride. I am SO proud of her for following her dream. There is no doubt in my mind that God will bless her in New York City...having His hand on her through every step of the way. I encourage you to sit back and think If you have a friend who TRULY makes you a better person...and if you don't...start praying for one. Every single person would be blessed to have a friend as beautiful as Buffy...and I can guarantee you that every one who has had the privilege of knowing her...feels the same way.

I love you, Buff.

The Bold and The Beautiful 

To lead this off…I’m oober frustrated. So I wrote a great post a few days after Mother’s Day but have just been too busy to finish and post it. When I went to go look for it tonight, it’s nowhere to be found of this computer. CRAP. I would like to say I could just rewrite it and share but to be honest, so much as happened since then I wouldn’t even know where to begin. Ooooh well. I’m going to go ahead and apologize for my lack of posts once again but I changed jobs and seeing we don’t have internet at our place (someone please bring reasonably priced high speed internet to Canton) I haven’t really had the opportunity.

 I’m going to use this post to play a little catch up. As I previously mentioned…I GOT A NEW JOB!!! Leaving where I was and my patient, Zach, was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made. I loved Zach like he was my own and he will always hold a very special place in my heart.

 

 Buuuut leaving there means being home EVERY NIGHT! I’ve been at my new job for three weeks now and I come home every night with my brain so overloaded I sometimes worry I will not be able to learn any more but I get to crawl in bed with my sweet husband and all the stress and headaches disappear. It gets easier every day and I know I will LOVE it once I get the hang of everything :)

So my mom and I have kind of made a tradition of going to Boulder every Memorial Day to see my brother and run the Bolder Boulder. This year we decided to expand the group and my Aunt Teri, my mom’s friend Amy and my friend, Jasie, joined us. I’m just going to go ahead a say that Colorado is one of my favorite places in the world. The weather, the people, the mountains…I just can’t get enough. We hiked up one of the flat irons in Boulder, which was absolutely amazing. 

 

 

 

 We visited the local pubs and festivals and took in some awesome Blue Grass music.

 And then we proceeded to dress up like complete idiots and run in this blast of a 10K! The pictures really just speak for themselves. SO MUCH FUN!

 

 

 Oh Oh Oh…Lilly lost her front tooth. PRESH. 

Josh and I are still adjusting to our new routine but we are loving all the time we are getting to spend together. No news on the baby front yet…but you better believe we are trying ;) I believe that will catch you up for now…so until next time!

Kayleigh

Judgement Day

Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, than you are criticizing God’s law. But your job is to obey the law, not to judge whether it applies to you.  God alone, who gave the law, is the Judge. He alone has the power to save or to destroy. So what right do you have to judge your neighbor? -James  4:11-12

Every single day is a challenge. I challenge myself to be a good wife, a good mother, but most of all a faithful woman of God. Today…that was challenged. For those of you who know me personally, you know that I have come a long way in the last 4 years. I have gained and lost. I have suffered and flourished. I have soared and been set back. But at the end of the day I am proud of who I am and what I have become…and I know that God is too.

Months ago I went to a friend of mine who is a very talented photographer to do a boudoir shoot as a gift for my husband. I had done a lot of research on different photographer’s websites to find exactly what I was looking for. Sexy, playful, but above all else, tasteful. The shoot was a blast and I was thrilled with the outcome. My husband loved the gift and I would recommend any wife to consider doing this for their husbands. Today my friend asked me if it would be alright for her to put some of my pictures on her website to help grow her business. Her being as talented as she is, and such a wonderful friend, I had no problem giving her the rights to my pictures. I did however instruct her to be selective on which pictures she chose because some were very clearly only meant for my husband’s eyes.  

Being from the conservative, small town that I am, I knew that there would be people who would not approve of these pictures. I was prepared for that. What I was not prepared for was for my character to come into question. I recently posted a picture of the book I am currently reading entitled “Soul Detox” and the exact words from this person were, “It’s shocking for someone who is trying to detox their soul.”  I had no words. I couldn’t understand how me having pictures made for my HUSBAND turned into my faith being questioned. She then went on to say how I post a blog about being Christian but then post inappropriate pictures for the world to see and that I am not setting an example for young girls.  OK…I’m just going to go ahead and say I am sorry to anybody who was offended by the pictures. But what it comes down to is that these pictures were not put on a personal  site but a photography site. A site that woman will go to while doing research similar to the research I did and say, “Wow, those are exactly what I am wanting to do for my husband!” I also would never encourage young woman to take pictures like this. This was a gift from a wife to her husband. My friend has already gotten many inquires about boudoir shoots since she put up the shoot we did together. I am so happy that I will have some small part in helping her business grow. 

I, not for one second, will pretend that I am perfect in my walk with the Lord. Nobody is. But I have consciously made choices to better my relationship with the Lord and live a Godly life. For someone to bring that into question is hard for me to swallow.  I do not feel like I am being a hypocrite by openly talking about my faith and sharing the Word by allowing these pictures to be posted.  I stand by my decision of helping a friend. I am ok with it, my husband is ok with it, and I know my Lord is ok with it.

 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.  Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,  I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 3:12

The person that this involved and I have talked and have no bad blood.  Everything I have said on here I have also said to them…so I am not speaking ill of anyone behind their back.

 I will leave you with this. If you don’t know someone, do not judge them. Trust me, it is something that I work on every day because old habits die hard; I am by no means perfect. You don’t know why they make the choices they do and frankly, it’s none of your business.  You are entitled to your own opinions, but keep them to yourself. Slander is very hurtful.

I hate that my first post in over a month is something as negative as this, but like I have explained many times, this blog is my outlet. My next post will be much more upbeat…and I promise is won’t be another month before it is posted.

Until next time…