Nothing is Easy

Tonight I realized something. Nothing about parenting is easy. When you choose to have a child, I'm not sure that this is considered. Sure, they are cute and fun and almost always challenging in a great way...but they are also fragile, innocent, and easily hurt. My daughter, Lilly, will be 7 next month. She is at a tricky age. She has the sweetest heart to go along with her super sassy attitude. She passes out "i love yous" and hugs like it's nobodies business...but that girl can give you a look of 1000 deaths. I had Lilly as a teenager...so we have literally grown up together and as much as I'd hate to admit it....she is just like me. And with that comes some challenges of their own. She doesn't always communicate how she feels but I have learned her personality to a tee. That is why it is so hard when you KNOW something is bothering your child but you are unable to communicate it with them. Lilly just got home from Spring Break in Oklahoma with her dad's family. They are absolutely wonderful and love Lilly dearly. While she was there, her dad and soon to be step mom had a gender reveal party to announce the gender of their baby due just three weeks after ours. From everything Lilly tells me, she had a wonderful time and is very excited. Well, here is the thing...she is telling me one thing...but acting a completely different way. Since she has been home, she has consistently called Josh, daddy. This is very out of the ordinary for her. We have never pressed the issue and left it up to her. On top of that, she has been very clingy and super sweet. Not to say I'm not loving this...I just know that something is up. I began thinking about all that is going on in her life. Both her dad and I are expecting a new addition to our families, making her go from being an only child of 7 years to having 2 little brothers in the matter of weeks. Josh and I have been looking to move out of Canton and Lilly understands that she will no longer be going to school with the only friends she has every really had. And on top of everything I believe her dad will be moving back to Oklahoma sooner than planned...

My poor baby.

Her little life is being turned upside down. I can only imagine that she feels like she is being left behind with all these new, BIG, changes. I think we have been making a good effort at not making it sound like this baby is in any way, shape or form more important than her...but how do I know if we have been successful with this? This little girl's heart is THE most important thing to me in this world and all I want to do is protect it. It makes me realize that every choice we make, every word we say, effects her directly. Like I said in the beginning...nothing about parenting is easy. Even loving them is challenging in its own way. All I know is we have to do the best we can, every single day, to express to our children how much we love them and show them that their feelings matter. 

Being a parent is the hardest job you will ever love. 

Weeks 19 &20!!

Well we are just moving right along! Half way there woohoooo!!! I'm hoping the next 20 weeks fly by like the first ones did. I'm so ready to meet my sweet boy!

Growing bigger every day!

Half way there! Woo hoo!! 

How far along? 20 weeks

Baby is the size of an: banana :)

Total weight gain: 17 uuuugghh. This isnt looking good...

Maternity clothes? Yes :)

Stretch marks? nope

Sleep: pretty good lately 

Best moment this week: Lilly finally got to feel Tabor kick! It took her being super sick to sit still long enough for it...but it was worth it :)

Movement: Yes!! All the time!

Have you told your family and friends?Yes! 

Miss anything? Lately...running. Im trying to walk a couple of miles 3 times a week and it just isnt cutting it 

Food cravings: water! Thank goodness! 

Anything making you queasy or sick? no!! 

Gender: Boy! 

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: My legs are still giving me fits 

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy!

Looking forward to? Starting on his nursery! So fun!

I will be posting another post ASAP! I's staying behind :( 

 Week 16, 17 and 18!!

I knooooow!! I'm 3 weeks behind. I really am sorry and I will do better. So much has happened since my last post. As most of you probably know...IT'S A BOY!!! We are absolutely over the moon! The gender reveal party was the most amazing thing I have ever been a part of. I am so glad Josh and I chose to wait and share that moment with all of our friends and family. To this day, I still believe that this is not just mine and Josh's journey but everybody's who has stood by our side this last year. I will post pictures and the AMAZING video of the party soon. I PROMISE! So as I sit here in the airport waiting to board by plane to New Orleans, I thought I would take advantage or their {not free} Wi Fi and get caught up!

How far along? 18 Weeks

Baby is the size of an:bell pepper

Total weight gain: shot right on up to 13. Yikes!

Maternity clothes? Yes :) I know I COULD fit into my regular pants...but my maternity jeans are SO much more comfy and surprisingly cute!

Stretch marks? no siree

Sleep: ehh....I keep waking up laying on my stomach which is terribly uncomfortable as you can imagine. So im up numerous times throughout the night.

Best moment this week: Feeling my sweet baby move :) It's just me for now...ive got one anxious daddy and big sister on my hands!

Movement: Yes!! Finally!! 

Have you told your family and friends?Yes! 

Miss anything? Margaritas still. I just spent the weekend in New Orleans and let me tell ya...that was tough!

Food cravings: sweets...sweets...sweets

Anything making you queasy or sick? no!! Yippeeee

Gender: Boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: Round ligament pains are OUT.OF.CONTROL. owwwwww

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy!

Looking forward to? Seeing Tabor again!

15 Weeks!

{I need to get back to taking pictures when i'm dressed and not 

absolutely exhausted. Oh welllll}

How far along? 15 weeks 4 days

Baby is the size of an: apple 

Total weight gain: still hanging out right around 5

Maternity clothes? not yet...but scrubs should pretty much be considered maternity clothes

Stretch marks? no 

Sleep: waking up multiple times throughout the night. no bueno

Best moment this week: invitations sent out for the gender reveal party!

Movement: not yet

Have you told your family and friends?Yes! 

Miss anything? pretty much just feeling normal in general 

Food cravings: not so much cravings but I cannot seem to get full! uh oohhhh

Anything making you queasy or sick? not eating right when I get up. Josh and I had a very unfortunate incident in the car on the way to church on Sunday :(

Gender: AHHH who knows! We find out next week!

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: Lower back pain is already getting the best of me. boo

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy...but still hormonal 

Looking forward to? Seeing the baby next Thursday!!

14 Weeks!

Sorrrry...im a few days late.

        This is what every day, worn down, tired Kayleigh looks like. 

Scrubs and all. 

How far along? 14 weeks 

Baby is the size of a: lemon 

Total weight gain: 5ish

Maternity clothes? nope

Stretch marks? no 

Sleep: Not great. My back has really started to hurt :(

Best moment this week: My docotr's appointment was easy peasy. Which is always a good sign. 

Movement: not yet

Have you told your family and friends?Yes! 

Miss anything? Margaritas. I desperately want a frozen margarita.

Food cravings: nothing really new this week 

Anything making you queasy or sick? nope. I've actually felt ok the last couple of days (knock on wood)

Gender: The last couple of days I have been thinking girl...just because EVERYONE is thinking boy

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: Really tired this week. All the energy is being suck out of my by this tiny human. 

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy...but I do have my hormonal, irrational moments. 

Looking forward to? Starting the nursery. SOO many ideas!

Week 13

Well hello there 2nd trimester! SOOO happy to see you!! I know that things can always go wrong but every single book/website/doctor out there says that your risk of miscarriage SIGNIFICANTLY decrease after the first trimester. (insert deep sigh of relief here) We are just trucking right along! Less than 4 weeks until we find out if our sweet miracle will be wearing bows or bow ties :) 

How far along? 13 weeks 3 days

Baby is the size of a: peach :)

Total weight gain: weighing in at +3 

Maternity clothes? nope

Stretch marks? no siree

Sleep: I have my good nights and bad

Best moment this week: Finally feeling like I have some of my energy back! Im not 100% yet but well on my way!

Movement: not yet

Have you told your family and friends?Yes! 

Miss anything? Coffee...my sweet, sweet coffee

Food cravings: I've actually been wanting to eat healthy this week. Lets keep it up!

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nothing in particular but still sick all day long. Ready to be done with this part. 

Gender: Boooooy

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: Nausea, nausea, nausea :(

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy!! I think it has something to do with not be absolutely exhausted all of the time! 

Looking forward to? Our gender reveal party! The more I plan, the more excited I get!! February 9th!! 

Week 12

Here's to getting my energy back and my nausea going away!! Hopefully this will be the last week of that...we shall see. I will say though, it has been so much fun finally being able to talk about it! I'm still having people come up to me and hugging me with all they have, telling me that we are continually in their prayers. Once again...THANK YOU!!

 Hello baby bump!

How far along? 12 weeks

Baby is the size of a: Plum

Total weight gain: It depends on what time I weigh lol. Still hanging in at 1

Maternity clothes? nope. I did buy a belly and back support thing the other day for work!

Stretch marks? nada

Sleep: This week it is becoming uncomfortable to lay on my stomach...so i'm having to adjust

Best moment this week: Josh getting to hear the baby's heart beat for the first time :) He isn't able to go to any of my appointments but he came up to my office and we did it there. It was amazing :)

Movement: no

Have you told your family and friends? Yes!

Miss anything? Coffee...coffee...coffeeeee

Food cravings: sushi...it needs to happen ASAP

Anything making you queasy or sick? Still...just about everything :(

Gender: boy....but I will be just as happy with another sweet baby girl

Labor signs: nope

Symptoms: So. Nauseus.

Belly button in or out? in 

Wedding rings on or off? on...always :)

Happy or moody most of the time? Happy! Hopefully the moodiness is passing

Looking forward to? having my energy back. I NEED my energy back.